Someone told us when our daughter was born that when you have a boy, you only have to worry about one penis, when you have a girl, you have to worry about ALL the penises. At the time, I just thought it was funny, but now that we are on the cusp of the teen age years…well, let’s just say it’s not so funny anymore!
I still remember being a teenager (I know my daughter will never believe that, it was “like ages ago”). I remember thinking that I was pulling things over on my parents, that my secrets were safe with my friends. I remember thinking that I hated my parents and that they hated me. I remember feeling like my brother was the favorite and I was the leftover. All the emotional turmoil is etched into my brain and my heart and I can bring up those feelings any time and relive the insecurity and the depression and the embarrassment that I felt as a teen. So I sympathize with my child, I really do….but I also sympathize with my mother and to her I offer a very heartfelt apology for all the pain I caused her and all the nights she worried while I was out having fun. If my mom ever wished a child like me on me, well, her wish came true; my daughter is me to a T.
My little girl is growing up faster than I can blink. Sometimes when I look at her I can still see the little girl in pigtails racing up to me and throwing her arms in the air to be picked up. Then I blink and look again and there is this beautiful young woman emerging.
We had “the talk” already. Then we had the “other talk”. For those of you who are unaware of what the “other talk” is, it is the one where I tell her that no matter what she does or what she says, there is nothing she can do or say to ever make me stop loving her. That there is going to come a time when she thinks that she hates me and that I hate her and that all of my brains have somehow fallen out of my head. I told her that when that time comes, there is only one thing I need her to remember. So she of course rolled her eyes and gave me a very surly “what?” My answer: “Just remember that I love you.” That’s it. Three words…no matter what you are feeling and what you are thinking: I LOVE YOU, my little girl. I miss the little girl you were, but I can’t wait to know the young woman who is emerging!
